German Idiosyncrasies

There are lots of little things I want to tell you, but ramble forever. I love it here now that it's green and warm and glorious. There are flowers everywhere, the vineyards and orchards are full, and you can walk through them, I've gotten used to the food, and have a few favorites (puten schnitzel mit pommes, bitte). I've figured out my clothing and shoes size and how to not ruin the laundry with every wash cycle. But here are a couple of idiosyncrasies about Germans ....

They stare. I already told you how they crowd you. They don't know personal space. They also don't know how to glance. When you walk or drive by them, they stop what they are doing and stare at you. I thought it was just us - maybe we are so American we are oddities (although I try to dress German and think I look like I fit in). But we are neither so gorgeous nor so freakish as to illicit this kind of attention. But then our German tour guide started a comment with "you know how Germans like to stare ...?" So it's not just us. I give them a big "Hello" or "Guten Tag", which kind of breaks the trance, but they still look.

They drink. Yeah, I'd heard of Octoberfest. But I never heard of being at a public pool and watching a guy give his 18-month-old a swig from a stein of beer. Or being on a train at 10am while people pass around a bottle of wine (they all had their own cups. They came prepared.)

They are unfazed by nudity. Most of the public nudity I've seen has been limited to the 0ver-70 and under-10 crowd. We went to a large public park that happened to have a wading pool play area for kids, and half the kids were running around nude. My kids weren't completely freaked out, but when you round a corner, not expecting to see a scene from Lord of the Flies, it takes you aback. And even Emily said, "why not just let your kids play in their underwear?" Then there's the representations of women everywhere. Our village had a fair down the street from our house and there was a carnival ride. On top was a topless mermaid (not much attention to detail on her face, but boy do they detail the breasts on all these things!) That's not even the weirdest part. The back wall was painted with all sorts of topless half-human females and one scene with a devil/ram man that qualified as sci-fi porn (yes, I know this begs questions about if there is such a thing as sci-fi porn and how I can state what qualifies, but go with it.). Then Vance went to an amusement park designed for families with smaller kids and he told me about one of the log-flume-like rides where you are in a bathtub. But first you go through a Roman bath scene. I looked it up on line. They were like naked store mannequins, but again, with the detailed breasts. But, as Vance said he told his buddy, "It's better than a bunch of women seeing you naked." It's all perspective, my friend.

Love you all. - Val